Fidelity

i think i should blog again..
as i'm getting old and i can't remember clearly what i've said or done...

well...
i have a new habit now..since i've installed an app in my hp..
where i can search for lyrics of songs that i listened to..
so while driving..when i listened to songs that i found interesting and catchy..
i just search for it using the app..
well i'm not going to talk about the app...
(but it helps me a lot coz previously when i listen to new songs..i was like..ok later i'll google it and download..but when i was in front of my lappy i've forgotten what i was supposed to do..)

well...
this one song by Regina Spektor..Fidelity..it is a nice song...

i never loved nobody fully
always one foot on the ground
and by protecting my heart truly
i got lost in the sounds
i hear in my mind
all of these voices
i hear in my mind
all of these words
i hear in my mind
all of these musics
and it breaks my heart
and it breaks my heart

suppose i never ever met you
suppose we never fell in love
suppose i never ever let you
kiss me so sweet
and so soft
suppose i never ever saw you
suppose you never ever called
suppose i kept on singing love songs
just to break my own fall
break my fall

all my friends say
that of course
it's gonna get better
gonna get better
better better better

i never loved nobody fully
always one foot on the ground
and by protecting my heart truly
i got lost in the sounds
i hear in my mind
all of these voices
i hear in my mind
all of these words
i hear in my mind
all of these musics
and it breaks my heart
and it breaks my heart




ha-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-art~~~

damaged

My damaged heart

I slave myself

To become a fool

So I stay

Even if it hurts

It's better hurt

Than feeling nothing

At least I know

These feelings are real

The questions are

How strong can I bear with the ache

And how long do I have to wait

years

years... she tried to mend the heart.. feared that it will break again.. if she ever lets others touch it.. years... others tried to convince the heart.. to give chances for happiness.. if she ever lets others touch it.. one day... she tried to be brave.. to open the door.. to give it a try.. to be happy again.. to believe that she deserves it... if she lets others to touch the heart.. but... it seems like the path that suddenly appeared in front of her... is not the path to happiness.. not her path but..others.. perhaps... she would find the right path.. the right place for the broken heart.. if she lets the right person to touch it.. p/s: things happened for reasons, and Allah knows best~

mimpi

mimpi mainan tidur pelarian realiti ke alam fantasi mimpi mainan angan mencipta kenangan yang tak kesampaian mimpi...

pmr

Dengan lafaz Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.. Dengan nama Allah yang maha pemurah lagi maha pengasih.. well.. it has been ages since my last post...and referring to my last post, alhamdulillah,,i have survived my days until now..for 7 months... and today is the big day for my form3 kids... PMR... hopefully everything is going well...smooth sailing... may Allah guides my kids throughout the days.. 9 A's kids...insyaAllah... ---cikgu eh yg comeh lobih~~ my prayers to all my kids~

it's been a month already

sedar tak sedar..
it's been a month already..
so many things that i want to talk about..
my experience working in a small school..
teaching students with low proficiency..
their attitudes towards my class...my subject.. etc..
but again...
whenever i feel like blogging..
all the ideas suddenly disappear..


what i can say is that..
i realize one thing while teaching my form 4 students, continuous writing.
they have too many ideas that they want to cramp everything into one sentence.
they cannot think for a simple sentence.
because they translate everything from mother tongue.
they're so used to writing in Malay, so they want to do the same when writing in English
ended up..cikgu yang pening how to create those sentences in English..

and today i feel soo tired..after teaching three classes, six periods...
it's not that i don't like teaching these kids..
but today lagi banyak marah dari mengajar..
and when i got angry..i'll feel 2x tired than normal day~
T_T

new school

alhamdulillah....
now i can no longer call myself "penganggur"
i got posted on 20th Feb to Sekolah Menengah Rendah Agama Jempol, Bahau, N9..
and right after i met the pengetua, GPK1, HEM, Ketua Panitia and the staff..i took 4days mc due to my allergy..mata bengkak~
and last week my students had exams..ujian penilaian kurikulum 1..
and i'm currently marking their papers..

so..HOW'S SCHOOL??
ok..basically..my school is a sekolah agama bantuan kerajaan...
so banyak kekurangan dari segi infrastructures, facilities and resources..
and the students' proficiency level...hurm..sadly..it's quite low..only few that could really understand English...
most of them..they'll stare at you blankly when you speak 100% English with them and they'll just either nod or shook their heads..
i really have to start from basic..i have to make them understand that He is for Male and She is for Female.. and tell them the difference between its and it's... etc...
not only that..
Classroom Management!!!!
as for my Form2 and Form4..i guess it shouldn't be a problem...kot..
but form my Form3...haiyeeeee....
they just don't know how to sit on their own chairs...
the boys who sit next to the windows will do surveys on how many people walk by or how fast a motorcyclist ride his/her bike...
ect...
nak kena ugut bayar RM10 baru nak senyap..

T_T

and one more thing..i'm staying in hostel~~~
i really thought that once i finish my study..no more HOSTEL LIFE for me~~
urghhhhh...


oh yeah...
i think..soon..i'll become a true N9 resident..
in terms of the language that i use...

i find myself calling my kids like my sister's teachers
saying stuff like "tak do...tak dapek.."
and even calling them "ey bang.."

well...
let's see if i can survive few more days...












ni yang den raso nak kawen copek...den taknak dok kek asrama!!!!!!